Good morning, family!
Hope everyone is weathering the insane weather this week!
I used to love a good thunderstorm, but Damn! Could I be inside
when one hits... just once!?
Best wishes for a glorious day......
One Day At A Time!
(Or for the truly challenged among us...like moi--
One Millisecond at a Time!)
Hang in there...
I wonder what it would take for us all to be capable and
comfortable of shedding our masks? Just completely
exposing ourselves to those around us....removing all
pretense, posturing, and artifice.
Many say that we have a public and private persona for
self-preservation; that there is a psychological and
sociological purpose to such fronts..they are healthy.
But I see the opposite in play. I see a world of people
who are busily competing with one another to appear
tireless and unaffected. I see people who smile hollow
smiles and let no one in, while right next to them is
someone suffering from the same dilemma.
If we opened up to express our true concerns, our true
selves, we would see that isolation, loneliness, despair,
money worries, health problems, parent issues, and the
like are universal. We feel dehumanized as a result of thinking
we are unique--or ill--because of the ideas and feelings we
Even in controlled environments where sharing is permitted
and encouraged, there can be a staged atmosphere.
The level of trust and intimacy is dictated by the energy
of the group as a whole. "I'll show you mine if you show me
yours" has to start with somebody to get the ball rolling, and
often times no one is willing to bite the bullet and start.
I had a horrendous day yesterday. I survived it; I was
victorious...but the feelings I went through were painful,
and I didn't want to make myself further vulnerable by
expressing my short-comings to others. But I soon found
that others--remarkably enough--were having rough days
of their own. Perhaps if I share my low points, others
can remember my pain and know that they are not alone
when they experience theirs.
I doubt myself. I wonder what my purpose is--or even if
I have one. I question whether anyone truly loves me, no
matter how recently love has been expressed. I get angry
at the injustice in this world. I resent foolishness and other
things I can't control, even as I understand I can do nothing
about it. I hate being weak, powerless, and ineffective.
And then I beat myself up for not measuring up enough to know
how to do better..."like everyone else does!" (Yeah, I get that
magical thinking, too.)
I want to understand why things happen. (I want to be able
to let go of needing to understand why things happen.)
I wonder why I can't seem to catch a break? Then I wonder
why I can't be content with what I have. Sometimes it all feels
like a never-ending cycle..and I just want to step off the
not-s0-merry-go-round for a moment...reassess
whether I even care about that damned brass ring any longer!
If we all talked about such things...perhaps we would feel less
apprehension and defeat when we start to experience such
disheartening circumstances and emotions. To know that
others have been through this.....have endured.....have seen
light on the other side...it can be a beautiful thing. To remember
that we are not alone in this journey is an incredible blessing.
Today, I will remember that everyone I meet is fighting with a
Today, I will share my experiences so that others know they
are not alone.
Today, I will be strong and know that there is nothing that can
occur which cannot be endured.
Let me embrace peace; it's only life, after all.
My problems are only as important as I allow them to be.