In My Sights

I was driving the animals to the vet's office yesterday and

there was a flurry of activity from some of the inevitable

post-rain mosquito army that had gotten trapped in

the vehicle.

The bloodsuckers were so aggravating

that I finally succumbed and began swiping at them with

my 'spare' hand, and of course the entire car swerved.

Even on a deserted road, the ease at which I lost

control and could have wrecked was heavy on my mind!

In just that quick a second, I was reminded that the driving

of the car was so much more important than the irritations

of the dozens of annoying bugs.

It synched in my head just how easily those minor

distractions can pull our notice from the larger, more

significant matters that need keep our attentions.

I've had an issue with neighbor difficulties of late,

and it had threatened to engulf my mind and emotions.

The incident with the car helped to remind me that

keeping focus on the real, core isssues will not

only prosper us in the long run, but keep the more

nonsensical errata from driving us nuts.

***

Perspective

Nobody's ever the same on the inside

as they pretend to be on the outside.


Once you get that reality

entrenched in your mind--

that everyone is floundering,

duplicitous,

fraudulent,

frightened,

a wounded child in an adult's body...

feigning superiority...

nothing can phase you.

Des'ree - "Life" video

All of Des'ree's work is upbeat, inspirational, and encouraging...but I like this
one especially in video because of the freedom, the simplicity, the sense of flight
and escapism involved. It's just a good fun ride.

Hope you think so too!
*****************************************************

On The Flip Side

I used to believe I was being targeted for attack because
I was especially vulnerable--weak, soft, an outsider, apart
from the herd, little-missed...an easy target.


There's something about a professional victim that makes
everyone want to harness all their fury and and continue
the habitual assault. A vibe they give off, the desperation
and accessibility; a sad, wounded-animal look in their eyes.


Sometimes you turn a corner and new information can
surprise you, though.


Well, revelations surprise you. The info isn't new, it's just
new to you!


Now I know the true reason people targeted me (in addition
to the human race being filled with unrepentant asses, of
course.) 

I know the reason that people were especially malicious,
engaging in acrimonious assaults, going out of their way to
harm or ridicule me, ganging up on me...especially determined
to assassinate my character, draw me into fights, bring me low,
attempt to destroy self worth and financial stability.


These things happened, they happened often, and they
happened more than the average person seems to encounter.
But they didn't happen because I am weak; I was targeted
exactly because I am strong.


Folks spotted the energy in me and saw it as threat; they
sought to destroy a figure they feared before I knew what
was in me and had tapped into it. They saw my aimlessness and
lack of faith and they sought to take advantage of that before
I became who they feared me to be. They were right to be
afraid.


There is a beast of freedom within me, a rapturous demon
seed whose hunger won't be quelled.


Not by any thoughtless drones, or secretive, pious, bitchy,
dichotomous windbags.....not by the disingenuous and huddled
masses of the insecure and the subservient....not by coordinated
attacks of the well-groomed and well-connected.


I am whole, and beautiful in my frightening splendidness.
They cannot affect or influence me or threaten me any longer.
I cannot be controlled.


I am no longer unaware of the power within me, and I know
now that being conscious and embracing this power will only
increase the pointless onslaught of nay-sayers, haters, cajolers,
and assailants. They will be more organized and more determined
and more ferocious, thinking that their unification and self-righteous-
ness will give them favor. It won't.


I am an unstoppable juggernaut, and I have not yet begun to fight.

*******************************************************

"Everything is going to be all right."

It isn't some crazy notion lacking contact with life's
circumstances.

At the end of the day, it is a real and
powerful assessment of the significance of our silly
troubles (big, small and in-between) in the larger
scheme of things.

Negativity and despair can easily become a lifestyle.

When my thinking is devoid of hope, the defeatist
attitude becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Today, I will tell myself that
"Everything will be all right."

Even if I don't believe it, I will tell myself this.

Even if my surroundings and 'evidence' seem
to run contrary to it, I will repeat the mantra.

Even when my supposedly flawless deductive
reasoning tries to convince me of the pointlessness
of it, reminding me of how history has shown the
opposite to be true.

If you go looking for trouble, you're awfully
likely to find it.

If I expect the worst of people and relive hurts,
if I constantly go through a laundry list of worries
and resentments, the end results will reflect that.
Emotions are energy, and energy is powerful.

Many of us have acquired sick thinking and kept
it going through our own devices and choices.
Life can be whatever we make of it.

We are often times worriers, fretters, catastrophizers,
cynics, nay-sayers, trouble-seekers, and critics.
This has not served us well. In fact, perhaps it has
fueled the very fire we sought relief from.

Does "Everything's going to be all right." seem
ridiculous and insincere and insane to me?
How much more insane to think the worst and
complain incessantly for years when there were good
things happening too.

If I cease comparing my rewards to those of others,
if I cease dwelling on and naming my misfortunes,
if I ignore the drama of other people's unrelated
issues and problems; what do I have left?

(Reminding myself that nothing has been promised
to anyone in terms of success, glamor, money, or love.
Every bit that does occur is pure gravy.

What I focus on and believe brings new business into my life.
I can't make a hasty under-the-breath pseudo pledge, then
open my eyes and expect it to appear. It isn't magic.
It takes work.

It took work to wear down a negative groove of expecting
nothing good, and countering these dark thoughts and apathy
will also take some time.

But in the meantime, just for today, assume it were possibly
true; "Everything's going to be all right."
You might surprise yourself.

*****************************************************

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us
are looking at the stars."
- Oscar Wilde


"You can be happy or you can be miserable;
the amount of effort is about the same."
- John Bradshaw


"What we see depends mainly on what we look for."
- John Lubbock

"We will always tend to fulfill our own expectation of ourselves."
- Brian Tracy

Perspective

Just for this moment, here and now,
let me pray for the strength and acceptance
to cope with what is, exactly as it is,
rather than praying for selfish want-lists,
mystical alterations, and fantastical
material 'solutions.'

Perhaps it is my understanding of what life is
that needs to change.
Perhaps I merely need to know that
understanding is not mine to have, and maybe
it isn't as important as I perceive it to be.

What I want hardly ever leads to anything
productive nor effective; let me remain open
to the new reality of already having everything I need.
What I can do with my world and my attitude and
my blessings is on me.

Let me keep close to my heart that not every
blessing is gift-wrapped or kindly. Some of my best
blessings are trials, 'difficult' people, hardships, and
pains....designed to move and mold me and provide
opportunities.

Let me awaken fully now to the many sides of things
beyond what I see.

Creative Visualization

The idea that the mind can alter reality is nothing new. There is still much resistance
to such a simple technique, however.

We are of a world where the physical, the immediate, the seen, and the majority are all prevalent. All else is dismissed out of hand. There is also a tendency to focus on the negative.
We are bombarded with negative imagery, talk, ideas, and people all day long.

Without proper guidance, motivation, or example, the negative seeming course of events can shape our minds. To dwell on the negative. To expect the negative. To focus on the negative at the expense of the positive. Even to interpret reality AS negative.

There is merely life; everything else, I bring to it.

One of the most damaging practices I see is to put emphasis on the road to salvation lying outside of one's self. Our betterment being dependent on the potential mercies of some supernatural existence. Salvation lies within.

Yes, there are forces and energies and things greater than us at work in the Universe. We have the ability--the choice--for those forces working either for us or against us. It isn't magic or voodoo; it's retraining the mind and emotions. We have to be open to possibility.

Every aspect of our live must undergo an overhaul. The thoughts we keep in our heads, the words we use with ourselves and others, the way we go about our day. The ideals we subscribe to, what we prioritize our energies for, the people we surround ourselves with.

Through changing my perspective on the matters at hand, the matter at hand is changed.

A death of a loved one is not an abandonment. It isn't something that 'happened' to you. It isn't part of a predetermined series of tragedies that is interfering with your life. It's the natural turn of the world; it happens. Devoid of any personal meaning.

A friendship ending is not a condemnation of your value as a person. It isn't the end of all future friendships. It doesn't make that friend a monster, or horribly wrong. It's just how things go; sometimes they work, and sometimes they don't.

The lack of permanence or consistency in life can scare us, since we've gotten so far away from embracing the natural flow of the world. We have the power to change our minds. We already alter the course of a day or events by maintaining negative, harsh, controlling, emotional stances. What could it possibly hurt to try talking to yourself without all the assumed pity, anger, resentment, criticism, and dread?

(see additional posts for specific ideas on changing patterns)