One of the hardest things I have faced in
life is the anguish of watching someone
you care about go through pain, and know
that you are helpless to act.
No matter the reasons for distance
between us and someone we care for,
we never want to see them in pain. We
don't relish their spinning their wheels or
the understanding that they are the
architects of their own destruction.
Knowing that things have to play out until
ego is crushed and there is willingness to
see the lesson in their misery is not a
comfort when your friend is in real pain.
You hope they will remain aware that
they can turn to you--or others--if they get
to a point of hurting badly enough that they
choose to do so. You hope the pain of
trusting someone will not cloud the pain
they are experiencing by going it alone.
But ultimately, we have to love people
enough that we let them go through what
they have to. We also have to love ourselves
enough not to get taken down by the tornado
of misdirected anger and animosity that
often accompanies a hurting person.
Integrity is when all the parts of a person
are integrated as one; whole, truthful, complete.
We can't make someone desire that for
themselves. But hopefully, if they know how
much we care, they'll take advantage of
our love when push comes to shove.
May I always be considering how to improve
my compassion and openness to mend
fences. May my past mistakes be forgiven, even
as I have forgiven another's. Life is too short
to avoid reconciliation.