Thoughts for the Day

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order,
confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a
home, a stranger into a friend.
Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace
for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."
--Melody Beattie



Life is not an easy matter... You cannot live through it
without falling into frustration and cynicism unless you
have before you a great idea which raises you above
personal misery, above weakness, above all kinds of
perfidy and baseness.
--Leon Trotsky




I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true.
I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live
by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody
that stands right, and stand with him while he is right,
and part with him when he goes wrong.
--Abraham Lincoln

"Hope you're doing well..."

I know better than to ask 'how' you're doing.
It seems insensitive in light of your current
plight.

I don't say 'Hope you're doing okay,'
because that sounds like I'm cursing you to
mediocrity.

I say "I hope you are doing well" as a prayer
and a blessing for your continued mental,
physical, emotional, and spiritual well being.
It may be all that I can do, until you are
ready to let me in, but it is not a wish made of
empty feelings.

'Doing well' means that I hope you are
remembering to care for yourself since
I can't. I hope you are doing the things
necessary to stay healthy, wealthy, and
wise...even though your heart may not
be in it.

It means I hope that you aren't letting
your friends and family's emotional
issues and traumas seep over and have
an adverse effect on you. Because you
and I can't allow ourselves the luxury
of absorbing other people's tragedies. We
have enough trouble 'fixing' us. And if
we aren't staying well and balanced and
focused and sturdy, we certainly can't
be of use to others.

I say all of this with true compassion,
and not a hint of animosity (though
you may not believe it now;) I am strong
enough to take your pain and lashing
out right now. I understand that you are
angry at things you can't control; death,
life, God, circumstance. I just happen to
be someone whom you can wrap words
and wrath around. And maybe you trust
I will love you enough to look beyond
this. I will not take it inside and make it
personal.

'Doing well' is shorthand all the great many
things I would like to say but that I am
not granted the time or audience to
say. My window of opportunity may not
be sufficient to speak the mountains of love
and concern I have in my heart for you.

It means, as cruel as this is, that life does
go on for the living. And if we don't stay in
the flow, it does go on without us. That won't
change reality, it won't bring anyone back,
and it certainly won't honor their memory
and importance to squander our miracle.
Our voice. Our passion. Our purpose.

Until the zest returns, until the light is back
on, you may have to muddle through and
fake it. Please fake it, until such time comes.
Let the action draw you along until the
inspiration returns.
We still love and need you.

Our pain cannot define us. Our grief and
misery cannot rule us. It isn't healthy for
us. It isn't fair to the living. It isn't respect
for the departed. This, too, shall pass.

Feel your rage.
Express it wisely, for your life is still going
strong, and you may have need of tomorrow.

Scream in a parked car. Beat a tree with a
bat. Get a punching bag and beat the hell
out of it. Get a junkyard car and destroy it.
Walk for hours. Run. Pray. Cuss God.
Cry.

Write your thoughts down. Send a letter to
your loved one. Talk to another person who
grieves. See a counselor. Go to group.
Let people in. Pray for help and understanding.
Release the pain.
Ask for help.

Everything you're feeling is normal and
all of it's okay. Feeling like hell is part of
tragedy. Hard as it is, we can and will make
it. Even though we may not care right now.

The only way past it, is through it. And until
you make it through, I pray you are doing
well. As well as can be expected. As well
as you can muster. Well enough to see what
blessings are still present, and not obscured
by loss.

I'll still be here when you're ready.

Self empowerment does not come at a price

I am capable of every good thing
 and so are all others I meet
I am a blessed and brilliant child of the universe
 and so too are those that try me
I am receptive to and deserving of all love
 as are strangers and friends alike
I am drawing prosperity of every sort
and there is enough to go around

Need for New Voices

The messages we play in our head tend to repeat themselves again and again. Consistency and intensity is what ties us to a notion--not necessarily reality.

A thought sets in motion the idea that the thought has merit simply because it has occurred and is not being actively challenged. This is not logical, but it is how we tend to function. We know all too well the phrase "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." but the problem is in our discernment skills and skewed perspective. We may not have a clue it's broken.

A word of sarcasm enters the room and fills the hearts of all who hear it.
Hatefulness lets others know you have a sharp tongue.
Speaking ill of others to their face releases venom and ill will.
Speaking about others behind their back informs others you are petty and deceptive.
There is no such thing as a 'little white lie.'
Cussing someone out in your mind while smiling and pretending tends to fool no one.
Gossip lets others know you are not to be trusted.
And so on, and so on...
The words and ideas we maintain have a vast impact on our immediate energy, mood, relationships, and the world we live in.

And like everything else, it's all related. So when we toss out a pebble of negativity, it causes a ripple effect that spreads outward.

In order to change the voices and ideas that we were burdened with from the past, we have to be willing to question and gauge their value. Then we have to make an inventory and decide what's worthwhile and what gets tossed. Then comes the task of "What do I put in my head --or my mouth--in place of all the old counter-productive, negative, complaining, catastrophizing thoughts and words?"

Instead of accusing and berating someone for doing something differently from how you would do it, ASK them if they wouldn't mind doing it your way. (Or, decide whether or not it's significant enough to bother with, and then let it go if it's minor. We get caught up on some of the craziest minutia.)

If someone is where you need to be, politely ask them to move. Sounds simple, but many people think that silently resenting is being 'non-confrontational.' It's passive-aggressive.

Where Do We Creatively Visualize

What do you 'do' when you awaken in the morning?

What are the first thoughts that pop into your head?

What are you thinking as you interact with others?

How do you feel about your job?

Do you feel grateful for what things are working in your life?
(Can you even see such things? Or does the idea anger you?)

Cuts Both Ways

If I would seek tolerance,
let me learn to be tolerant
of who others are and what
they believe, despite my
feelings.

If I would know love without
demands or criticisms, let
me practice being loving
without hesitation or reserve.

Instead of concentrating on
how others act and speak, let
me change my critical ways.
Let not one negative thought
come to my mind or lips
(including "This exercise is too
hard.")